Week Eight

I am now in week eight of my college career.  It does not feel like I have been in college for two months, but I have.  It doesn't feel like am halfway through my first semester, but I am.  It does not feel like I should have a routine, but I do.

There are times in life when things do not feel real, but they are.  About a month ago was the yearlong anniversary of the death of Danny Zaragoza, a little boy who lived in Mexico.  A year ago he went to be with Jesus in heaven.  It does not feel like a year has passed since I heard about his death on a Sunday morning.  It still does not feel like I have grieved properly for him.  How do you grieve for a child's death?  How do you adjust to not having him around when he already wasn't nearby?  I feel that the first time I visit his family, I will still expect to see him.  Instead, I will see a family, scarred from the hurt of losing a brother and a son, but healing with the Lord's help.

Truthfully, that is what I need to depend on in my extended grieving for Danny.  The Lord.  The Lord can heal my heart.  The Lord can help me grow to be where I need to be as a pseudo-adult a quarter of the way through her freshman year of college.  The Lord can help me form my routine so that I have time to give to him and time to give to my studies.  The Lord will be with me. :)

If you would like to read Danny's mom's blog about what his family did to celebrate the one year anniversary of Danny moving in with Jesus, click here. 

But you, Lord, are a shield around me, my glory, the One who lifts my head high.  I call out to the Lord, and he answers me from his holy mountain.  I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me.  I will not fear though tens of thousands assail me on every side.

Psalms 3:3-6